Just Dreaming |
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Saturday, September 17, 2005
The thing is, every failed relationship was once a good relationship. It's just that the failed part is the last thing you remember. Friday, September 16, 2005
I was relating a fun evening I'd had with a woman I'd met through neighborhood friends recently, at a party. This cute lady with short blonde hair and I hit it off, and ended up becoming closer... I was telling someone about that a little while later, and he asked me, "so, did you ask her out?" Well, no. Was I supposed to? I didn't know that was a given. What am I supposed to be, some sort of male behavioral robot? Funny thing is, girls (aka women) I know in person, some of them anyway, go for me, as I do for them. I mean, cute ones, different ages and things..... However, if one looks online, it seems like women (as well as men I suppose) limit themselves much more in their "specifications" for a male. I've learned not to put much trust in on-line meeting. I think usually, it just doesn't give you much if any idea of your actual chemistry. So, it's almost useless. Plus, why does it seem that the "real" local women are cuter than the ones who post personals. Not always. Usually.... I don't know, there's something very comforting about knowing a woman "looks" or seems interested in you, exactly you, the way you look, how you stand and present yourself - before you think about getting to know her better. If she is not interested, well, screw her. Then she's useless, and unattractive. ;-) Or at the very least, she's irrelavent. I'm no Johnny Depp, but I don't have any problem attracting attractive women. Now the next steps, well.... Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Sometimes, a girl is just unavoidably cute. As a guy, you don't really want to fall all over yourself over her. Then you see her, and the copies you were holding fly out of your hand. Hand can't think straight either when she's around. She smiles, she's amused. Good thing, you know you can amuse her alot with stuff like that, without really trying.... Later, you notice a girl in those red pants standing outside, talking on her cell. She just again happens to be there, and you're returning from a walk in the sunshine. As you pass her, carefully not looking in her direction *too* much, she turns her head over her shoulder, and smiles over at you. Sweetly, charmingly, ever so pretty looking. You act cool, smile back, and get through the doors to the building without tripping over yourself. Then, you can smile a little, inside. You haven't even gotten to first base. She threw you a ball however. You're a little closer. Just listening to the Beach Boys compilation CD Sprit Of America. I haven't listened to the Beach Boys for such a long time. Their music, so beautiful. Then, their lives, eech. Dennis dead far too young. Carl too, died too soon. Brian lived so much of his life haunted, lost. Still seems to be far from happy..... Thinking of my own experience with the Beach Boys. I first became a huge fan in late 1999, after listening to them off and on all my life. At first, my fandom was very happy. One of the very best experiences in my life. Then, it became less happy, with only moments that recaptured that happiness of the first year or so. Later, I experienced a certain betrayal, and it died. Not my interest in music, or appreciation of the Beach Boys. Just the warm relationship I shared as a result of my innocent entrance into the Beach Boys fan world. That ceased to exist, like the real Beach Boys did, so long ago. Ultimately, the dynamics didn't work, and egos clashed. Much like what happened with the Beach Boys. So too with at least two of their fans. |
